Stupidity: lack of intelligence, perception, or common sense. If Encarta is not mistaken, I believe that I have experienced stupidity countless times within a decade and seven years of my existence in this planet. Who would have not? Its human nature, isn’t it?
Most of the time, people, as well as I act stupid for laughter. But it may also be unintentionally committed. Just like when I doubted God’s presence. I may not be certain if it really is the stupidest thing I have done but it is indeed something I forever would remember.
It was the darkest chapters of my life when I questioned if He really does exist. I got tired of asking “why are these happening?”, “what have I done?”, “why me?” and so on. And so I just asked, “Are you really there?” My thoughts were so suspicious. I remember that someone once told me that God is just a mere image of hope for the people, nothing more than that. I told myself that he might be right. No one has seen him, and the books of the bible were just written by human-beings, imperfect, just like me. I thought that I may just be wasting my time asking for forgiveness and blessings from something or someone I am not so certain of.
Most of the time, people, as well as I act stupid for laughter. But it may also be unintentionally committed. Just like when I doubted God’s presence. I may not be certain if it really is the stupidest thing I have done but it is indeed something I forever would remember.
It was the darkest chapters of my life when I questioned if He really does exist. I got tired of asking “why are these happening?”, “what have I done?”, “why me?” and so on. And so I just asked, “Are you really there?” My thoughts were so suspicious. I remember that someone once told me that God is just a mere image of hope for the people, nothing more than that. I told myself that he might be right. No one has seen him, and the books of the bible were just written by human-beings, imperfect, just like me. I thought that I may just be wasting my time asking for forgiveness and blessings from something or someone I am not so certain of.
Bewildered, a verse unconsciously came into my mind, “Blessed are those who have not seen and yet believed.” That’s faith. God is like the wind, we don’t see it and yet when we feel it, we’ll know that it’s there. In the end, I have come to realize that God answers all our prayers but in three ways: he says “yes”, “no” and “wait.” I learned that if he doesn’t answer my prayers. It is because he would answer it in his time or he has something better for me. Still, despite my stupidity, I know and feel that God loves me.
2 comments:
I think you’re not stupid in asking the existence of god. Your just curious the things that happen in life. You started to asked it when you having a problem, sometimes people hard to accept the failures they encountered, because of that we tried to blame other people to lessen the pain inside. But have you thought that he gave you such problems to test your faith towards him?
How times do you pray? When you pray did you praise him in his goodness or simply asking his forgiveness and blessings like what you said? Do you say thank you for him in every blessing you received? Who is God in your life? Do you really believing him or you just put into your mind that there is a god?
I understand your sentiments because even I question god existence. I grew up believing in god because my mother taught me about it. I realized that we might adopt the trends, how come children knew god? They still young to have broad imagination about god. They knew god because I think that’s what they see and that’s the faith of majority.
However it’s hard to look for the answer about it. It’s up to you how you value him. In my case I putted god as my conscience. He reminds me every time I did wrong to somebody. I know he is just testing my faith towards him.
The mere fact that you experienced that hardship and difficulty at one point in your life proves that God loves you. Without those experiences, you won’t be able to realize those things. Having experienced difficulties and hardship, we become learned and everything we believe is substantiated.
Sometimes, we experience hardship for us to learn, for us to keep holding on, for us to keep on believing that no matter how we suffer in this world but when we do whatever is right, our sacrifices would be recompensed.
PS: Mic, I admire you for being a real and bubbly person. I am glad that I have had the chance to be close to you during the Inkblots conference and now in GMA. I am just here no matter what.
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